Shakin' SparkyMark Hughes is a very proud man. It's just a shame that his pride makes him act like a prat. Oh Sparky, what has happened to you?
One of the great blights of our game resurfaced over the weekend. One of those things nobody likes to see. An awful sight that sickens the soul and seems to happen all too often these days.
Yes, once again, Lord have mercy on our souls, somebody inadequately shook Mark Hughes's hand.
Martin Jol was the culprit this time, with Sparky visibly pi**ed off after the post-match pleasantries.
"I offered my hand and he shook it readily," said Hughes.
"I took exception because I thought he was going to tap me on the head, which I deemed to be slightly patronising so I brushed his arm away."
Of course, this isn't the first time Hughes has objected to the way someone has pressed his flesh.
After Arsene Wenger disappeared down the tunnel rather than shake Sparky's hand in December 2009, he said: "It's his choice, but I have been on the end of a 6-2 defeat at the Emirates and I shook hands. There is a certain protocol to observe, so it's a shame because I have huge respect for Arsene."
After Tony Pulis refused Hughes's hand in December 2010, he said: "He is probably getting his own back, because I did a similar thing last time in the League Cup because I was a little bit aggrieved one of his players had taken out Moussa Dembele when it was unnecessary."
After Fulham played Manchester City last February, Hughes said of Roberto Mancini: "I had to offer my hand and do it with sincerity when my team was beaten 4-1 by Roberto's. I was disappointed but I acknowledged that his team was better and he deserved a handshake with sincerity.
"Maybe I misread it, but I just didn't think Roberto acknowledged the efforts of my team and how well we'd done, by the way he offered his hand."
So, in summary, after a QPR game, a manager must definitely shake Sparky's hand, but crucially must look deep into his eye and not - repeat, not - pat him on the head.
Hopefully that's clear now, and we can put this whole sorry business behind us.
Monday, 27 February 2012
All shook up
From the always entertaining Football365: